Saturday, February 7, 2009


Recently met with Ditz the Titz who took a hiatus from her peads (also known here as “peja”) work in Jersey Shore and treated us to dinner. The last time I saw her was in May 2007 when she visited my dad in the hospital lugging around a Green Lantern comic book in Spanish. Ditz the Titz is a fixture in this blog, and both of you, two readers, might remember her as the one who asked our patient if he would take off his clothes in his show, and as the one who sings the male version in the duet of our block song, Fixing A Broken Heart. She has definitely come a long way since blaring “I’ve Never Been To Me” in Tresa’s, now looking tanned, toned, and with a nice huge striped ribbon on her chest.

Titz showed us photos of her adventures in Jersey, with the American nurses and doctors and all. I noted that everyone was wearing long sleeves under their scrub suits, which of course is very Grey’s Anatomy. I remarked that a few interns tried doing that in our ER in an attempt to look cool, and they all ended up with huge armpit sweat circles that reached down the waist. Jabar, therefore.

With Smoketh we opened fire with a barrage of questions: Do the interns monitor sweaty patients q1? Any dates? How rich are you? All of which were answered to our satisfaction. We learned that aside from your residency work you can also moonlight, for one thousand dollars per duty. Smoketh and I immediately converted the money to pesos in our heads with kaching, kaching cash register sound effects, and realized it’s more than what we would make in months.

Titz is popular in the Filipino nursing community there, specially when they learned she was chummy with Hayden Kho in med school. She hasn’t talked to Hayden in a year, but she is contemplating on getting an autograph just for them kilig nurses. Apparently Pinoy showbiz brings up a sense of community, because there is still some occasional race weirdness going on. Referring to another Filipino who looked quite different to her features an American nurse recently asked her, “Are you from the same tribe?” to which she retorted with “What about that other American nurse, are you from the same trailer park?”

Driving back home we almost hit another car, to which we all collectively gasped “POTA!!!” She could only scream “FUCKER!” in Jersey, and she felt great coming home to her heritage. We realized we wouldn’t see each other in a long time again, so we had a vicarious fellatio-cunnilungus combo. Click this link for this nasty, nasty, X-rated porn pic. (failure to provide link)

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