Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Bridget Fonda

As Smoketh and I were standing in the rain hoveled under 1 tiny umbrella it came to our attention that tonight's lotto jackpot is 400 million pesos. Nothing big, just... 400 million pesos! This is a lot of money even to those who are already rich, so this is a lot lot lot of money for us who subsist on abuloy from patients for lunch. As we got soaked just to get to The Shrine MotherFucker 1, like everyone else we enumerated what we would do if we win.

Me: You win P400 million pesos and libre ang mangarap, and it is already a given that love, faith, attention, intelligence, breeding, and impeccable English cannot be bought by money and should therefore not come into the equation and the goal is to be totally materialistic, what will you buy?

Smoketh: Right now... I'll quit training.
Me: Me too. Then I'll go to Druid's Keep and buy the entire store.
Smoketh: I'll buy a condo unit.
Me: Or four. Or five.
Smoketh: A unit with a toilet bowl. With a flush.
Me: I'll buy a liver. Two livers.
Smoketh: A room with everything in it.
Me: A room with Gloria Jeans inside and Tin the coffee barista who can make the perfect Voltage.
Smoketh: A personal chef. And for your toys, you can get many eskaparate for your toys.
Me: Walls and walls of eskaparate. And I can pay for sex.

The last one was a bait of course for Smoketh to just rattle off a WAF staple: You don't need to pay for sex. Yes, we need these sorts of affirmations. Having gotten to The Shrine MotherFucker 1 we immediately separated thoughts and immersed ourselves in our own computers. And who should ring Smoketh but DDDD (Dastardly Dude with Delectable Derriere, for those of you who keep tabs). And what should I do but eavesdrop. Conversation went like this:

Smoketh: Tonight's jackpot: P400 million pesos. What will you buy?

This is of course a sign that this is the right time to watch: A Simple Plan! Starring Billy Bob Thornton, Bill Paxton, and Bridget Fonda wherein they find millions of dollars in a plane crash and they all do stupid things. Or maybe we can re-enact it. I'll play Billy Bob, of course. Smoketh would be Bridget Fonda who would say the line: You can kill him... and make it look like an accident.

7 comments:

BOTD said...

like! *thumbs up* buth si DDDD ba si Bill Paxton? AHAHAHAHA.

I will buy an island. so that i will have my own shore. AHAHAHAHAHA.

anyhoo. that's a nice thought bubble bago matulog...what to buy with 400 million frickin pesos! wahahaha.

will said...

yup DDDD can play Bill Paxton, and remember that Bill Paxton and Bridget Fonda had... a baby AHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Callistus Netromedev said...

i remember you quoting the movie during lunch one time. you won't have to pass on the soup and the salad!

during a toycon, i'd buy all the unopened Marvel Legends from ToyBiz that i missed. and also all The Force Unleashed series. i'd then proceed to rip open their packages in front of the purist collectors and smash them against one another while making laser and explosion sounds.

that'll be one fu!

HTGOF said...

i will build my HTGOF library with the big cafe at the fourth floor and club twice the size of republiq at the basement! na-wink-an ka ba ni smoketh when DDDD called? AHAHAHAHAHA! i'm so sorry lloydie for making sir will call you and recite all your patients ahahahaha. hoy BOTD hati na lang tayo sa island. then the rest of the money... we can use as toilet paper. AHAHAHAHA! and someday we too shall wink...

kaye said...

Funny, I was thinking of posting something like this...which made me remember my thoughts on what I'd do with the P400 million. I actually wanted to place a bet last night. Only the betting station was already closed, which also made me think that Lotto is probably waiting for me to place my bet because I am the next big winner. (Yes, I claim it!) Don't worry, I'd give you enough money so you could have those eskaparates built. On second thought, I will just ask Papa to build you those eskaparates which would probably save me some balato money for you. Ahahahahaha!

will said...

@callistus, yes, i always quote that, because I live that quote "we no longer have to skip appetizers and come home for deserts" ahahahha. worse pa nga eh, I even skip... drinks! ahahahahha tama na ang tubig

@htgof, na winkwinkan ako ni smoketh... at ni DDDD! ahahaha. in my head. sinabihan ko na lang sya ng sweet dreams over the phone.

@ate kaye, oo nga lahat ng nadaanan naming lotto stalls ay sarado na ahahahaha mabenta ang tindahan! pati sa facebook ay hot topic ang kaperahan ahahahaha

BOTD said...

oooooh! a baby! for more wisdom! AHAHAHAHA.

HTGOF: lagay natin yang library mo with club sa isla for more! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. hoy ano...may nahanap ka na bang DDDD mo dyan?